Diamond in the Rough
by Keitorin Asthore
Summary: Sokka is a roguish street rat who just wants to make good. Zuko and Azula are searching for the longlost avatar in order to harness his power and take over the world. And then a mysterious princess interferes in everyone's plans. Inspired by Aladdin.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Avatar: The Last Airbender belongs to Bryke and Nickelodeon, not me. Neither does Aladdin; he belongs to Disney.

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You stroll through the bazaar as evening falls. Most shopkeepers shut their windows and close their doors, preparing for the evening. But one cart remains open. A young lady- redheaded, applecheeked, and petite- busies herself with the ribbons and knickknacks dangling from the racks. She notices you and smiles.

"Good evening," she says. "Is there something I can help you with?"

You shake your head and walk away. She smiles again and steps closer, her hands behind her back. "I can see you are only interested in the exceptionally rare," she said, her eyes twinkling with an impish sort of mirth. "What do you think of this?"

She holds out her hand and unfolds her fingers. A small white whistle in the shape of a bison lays in her palm, glistening in the moonlight. "Don't be fooled," she says. "It may look like a child's plaything, but it's so much more. Like many things, it's not what's on the outside, but on the inside that counts."

You shake your head again. Before you can escape, she sidesteps you, still holding the toy. "This is no ordinary whistle," she said. "It once changed the course of a young man's life. A young man who, like this whistle, was more than what he seemed. A diamond in the rough." She palms the whistle and it reappears in her other hand. "Would you like to hear the tale?"

You shrug. After all, you have nothing better to do this evening.

-----

The young man pulled the hood of his cloak over his head. "I don't like this," he mumbled.

"You don't have to like it, you just have to go along with it," his sharp-eyed companion snapped. "Here he comes. Stand up straight and shut up." She flicked an errant lock of dark hair out of her face. "You are late."

"I'm sorry," he said. "I couldn't get away sooner, not even for a princess."

She handed him a scroll. He unrolled it and squinted at it in the darkness. "I trust you know what to do," she said.

He studied it for a moment more, stroking the small mustache above his lip. "I think so," he said. He handed the scroll back, flexed his fingers and took a broad stance.

"Step back," the young woman said to her companion. He did so.

The mustached young man executed a few smooth moves, and the ground beneath them rumbled to life, splitting open and revealing broad steps that spiraled deep into the earth. "I think I found it," he said.

The girl clutched her companion's arm. "That's it!" she hissed. "That's it."

"Ow, that hurts," he complained, shaking her hand away.

She crept up on the mustached earthbender. "Now, you know what to do, right?" she said.

"Get the whistle," he said.

"That's right," she said. "Take whatever you want, but the whistle is ours."

He strode up to the stairs. "Who approaches?" a deep, rusty voice intoned.

"Just Haru," he said. "An earthbender."

"Only one may enter the cave of the avatar," the voice rumbled, echoing across the darkened desert sands. "The diamond in the rough."

Haru glanced over his shoulder. The young woman shrugged. "Not my problem," she said. "We paid you to get it for us."

He took a step farther into the depths of the cave. Nothing happened. He let out a short little laugh, his shoulders raising, and took another step.

The deserts rose up, swallowing the staircase and the earthbender. In a moment, the sand settled, as smooth as glass. The young man choked.

"What just happened?" he sputtered.

The young woman sighed. "That's why we hired someone else to actually go inside," she said. She crossed her arms. "We'll just have to find this 'diamond in the rough' individual and go from there."

Her companion scowled. "Why do I always go along with your stupid plans?" he said.

"Because they're not stupid, and you couldn't find a good idea if it bit you on the ear," she said. "Come along, Zuzu. We need to be back before anyone notices we left."  
"Don't call me that," he mumbled, but he followed her anyways.

-----

"He was just here a moment ago! Some ponytailed kid with a stupid boomerang."

He paused atop the roof to scowl. "It's a warrior's wolftail," he corrected. "And my boomerang is _not _stupid."

The shopkeeper glanced up. "There he is, officer!" he said. "There's the thief!"

"We'll get him," the guard snarled.

Sokka scrambled over to the next roof. "Oh, man," he said. "Gotta stay on top of things." The guard hollered, and half a dozen more joined him, all armed to the teeth. Sokka glanced down. "All this for a cabbage?" The guards clambered up the sides of the house. He hastily shoved the cabbage down his tunic and dodged into the first open window he saw.

He landed squarely in a pile of clothing- girl's clothing. "Great," a dry, deadpan voice said. "It's him again."

He pulled a dress off his head. "Morning, Mai," he said. "I'm sure you're looking forward to the new day."

"Ecstatic," Mai said.

"Good morning, Sokka," Ty Lee giggled. She tossed him a veil; he draped it over his head. "You're getting in trouble awfully early."

"You know me," he shrugged. "Trouble never sleeps."

"Coming to haiku class tonight?" she asked, dropping cross-legged on her bed and staring up at him under her lashes.

"Crashing haiku class is more like it," Mai grumbled.

"Maybe, maybe not," he said. "Depends where the wind takes me."

The front door crashed to the floor. "Where's the ponytail?" the guard demanded.

"And I believe the wind is taking me away," Sokka said. He tore off the veil and dashed to the opposite window. "Ladies…" He dropped out the window, landing on the awning above a shop. A lemur scrabbled up the ropes and leaped onto his stomach. "Oh, there you are, Momo. Good timing."

Three guards crammed in the window above them. "There he is! Get him!" one of them hollered.

"Good timing's not good enough," he said. He grabbed Momo around his fuzzy middle and bolted.

The guards may have been armed and dangerous, but they hadn't grown up on the narrow streets of the city since their baby days. Sokka dodged through the alleys and byways until at last the city guards were lost far behind them.

He slumped down against the wall, plunking Momo down beside him, and wriggled the cabbage out of his shirt. "And now, your Momoness, we feast!" he declared. He pulled a handful of leaves off the round vegetable and handed them to the lemur.

He had just torn a huge bite of the slightly bitter cabbage when two small children crept around the corner of the alley, peering at him while he ate. Sokka slunk down. Momo looked at his cabbage, then padded lightly over to the two children. He held the leaves he held to the little girl.

"Aw, Momo, don't do that," he whined. "If you feed them, then I'll feel guilty, and then I'll be hungry again."

The little girl took the cabbage and tore it in two pieces. She handed the larger of the two to her younger brother, who devoured it eagerly. Sokka sighed and pushed himself to his feet. "Here you go," he said.

"Thanks, mister," she said shyly. He flashed her a lopsided smile and scratched the back of his neck.

Noisy cheers echoed from the nearby marketplace. The two children looked up and darted down the alley. "What's going on?" he said. Momo chittered a response. "Well, if you didn't know, you didn't have to answer, now, did you?"

Sokka followed the children and blended into the crowd. The citizens cheered as a young man astride a gray horse strutted down the busy street. He tossed his shaggy dark hair away from his tanned face and flashed a broad, white-toothed smile at the people below. The young girls sighed.

"On his way to the palace, I suppose," an old man said. "Probably another suitor for the princess."

"Princess? What princess?" his equally old friend snorted. "There's not a princess. It's only a rumor."

"Then why do rich young men keep riding into the city to visit the palace?" the old man shot back.

"I don't know. Stop asking me questions, I'm old and I don't feel like answering them," he retorted.

Sokka rolled his eyes. Of course someone would bring up the princess. It was the biggest urban legend in the history of the earth kingdom- well, besides the myth about the avatar. He'd heard about them all his life. Neither of them could possibly be true.

"Out of my way, you filthy brat!"

Sokka snapped to attention to see the little boy frozen in the path of the gray stallion. His sister darted out to grab him, but she wasn't fast enough. The well-dressed young man raised his riding whip.

Before he knew precisely what he was doing, Sokka dashed into the path and caught the crop. "You know, if I was as rich as you, I could afford some manners," he snapped. He twisted the whip out of the young man's hand. The two children ran away and vanished into the crowd.

"Oh, I could teach you some manners," the young man seethed. He lunged from his saddle and yanked the whip back. Sokka lost his balance and fell backwards into the muddy street. The crowd roared.

Sokka sat up, wiping mud from his forehead with the back of his equally muddy arm. The young man smirked at the crowd, waving as he rode down the street. Momo trotted out of the crowd and hopped nimbly onto his shoulder. "Look at that, Momo," he said loudly. "It's not every day you see a horse with two rear ends."

The young man pulled the reins of the gray stallion, stopping him short. "You are a worthless street rat," he said, his every word chosen carefully. "You were born a street rat, and you will die a street rat, and only your fleas will mourn you."

He turned his horse sharply and trotted briskly down the street. Sokka scowled. "I'm not a street rat," he said, scratching the back of his neck. "Come on, Momo."  
Momo hopped onto his shoulder and tugged on his ear. "So maybe I am a street rat," he said. "But I wasn't always. I used to live at the south pole, with the rest of the water tribe." He sighed heavily. "But then the war…and I ended up here, without the rest of my family." Sokka twirled Momo's long soft tail around his finger. "But I guess things will eventually work out."

-----

The conversation dragged on. The handsome young man bragged about himself, while the king and queen sat patiently and listened to his lists of exploits and accomplishments.

A young woman in a plain dress strolled into the throne room. She leaned over and whispered something in the pretty queen's ear; Queen Poppy nodded and sat up straighter. "Prince Han, it has been lovely to talk to you," she said. "But something has come up. If you'll excuse us…"

Han cleared his throat. "If you don't mind, I have a question," he said. "I've heard about the princess-"

"That's only a rumor," the king said.

Han turned red. "But I heard-"

"One hears many things," the king said. He waved his hand. Han dragged himself to his feet and slunk away. The young woman crossed her arms and watched him exit out of the corner of her eye.

As soon as the doors to the throne room swung shut, King Lao leaned over and rubbed his forehead. "Toph," he called. "Toph, where are you?"

"She's in her usual spot," the servant girl said. She crossed to a large tapestry and drew it back, revealing a petite girl in a white embroidered dress.

The girl waved. "Hiya," she said.

"Where are your shoes?" her mother asked.

Toph pulled up the hem of her white dress and wiggled her bare toes. "Somewhere," she said. "I forget." The queen shook her head. "Well, I couldn't get a good look at the guy you wanted to marry me off to."

"Did you get a good look?" the servant girl asked.

"Horse-faced and sneering?"

"You win."

"Enough," the king said. "Toph, we have to pick a suitor for you to marry. Why do you persist on interrupting with your personal opinions?"

Toph shrugged. "It's fun," she said.

"_Toph_," the queen sighed.

"Well, it's fun for me," she said. She stepped past the curtain and walked into the throne room. "If you still feel the need to keep me hidden from the outside world, then the only source of excitement I get is eavesdropping on whatever suitors you drag in here. And I did _not _like that one."

"We have to keep you hidden, darling, it's for your own good," the queen said. Toph walked towards her mother; Poppy wrapped her arm around her daughter's tiny waist. "If it was known that you were blind, no one would want to marry you."

"Why should anyone have to marry me?" the princess shrugged.

"You know it's the law," Lao said patiently. "A queen cannot rule alone. And if you're going to be queen someday, you must follow your own laws."

Toph pulled away from her mother's arm. "If I'm being forced to marry, shouldn't it be for love?" she pointed out. "Can't we…I don't know, let me meet people?"

"Toph!" her mother exclaimed.

"They don't have to know I'm the princess," she explained eagerly. "They'll think I'm just some party guest."

"It's too dangerous," her father said, shaking his head. "You're blind. It'll be too much to you."

"You think everything is too much for me," she said, scowling. "I'm sixteen years old, and I've never even left the palace before. I don't even have a real friend."

The servant girl jammed her hands on her hips. "So what am I, stewed sea prunes?" she said.

Toph rolled her foggy green eyes. "You don't count, Katara, my parents pay you," she said.

"I like you, though," Katara said, unperturbed. "Well, most of the time."

"Thank you for your honesty."

"Toph, you must marry before your seventeenth birthday, and you must marry someone of noble birth," Lao said. "Those are the laws."

"There's too many laws," Toph said.

"You're a princess, and you must follow them," Lao said.

Toph scowled. "Then maybe I don't want to be a princess anymore," she said. She pulled the delicate golden tiara off her head and chucked it across the throne room. Katara ducked just in time; the band flew out an open window. Toph stormed away.

"I don't know where she gets it from," Lao said. "You weren't nearly this picky." Poppy looked down at her hands.

"I'll go find her," Katara sighed. "And the tiara. Again."

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**Author's Notes:**

I recently watched Avatar all the way through. Then I watched Aladdin. I haven't had enough sleep in weeks. This seemed like such a good idea at the time.

I hope you like this! I haven't written a comedy in a while, and I felt my funniness was getting rusty. So this is a lot of fun to write.

Also, I wrote myself in as the storyteller. I couldn't think of anyone else in the Avatarverse who might've worked (a lot more people will be cropping up later...)

Next chapter will be up soon!


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Avatar: The Last Airbender belongs to Bryke and Nickelodeon, not me. Neither does Aladdin; it belongs to Disney.

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Zuko scowled as he followed his sister down the hallway. "Don't make that face at me, Zuzu," Azula snapped. He rolled his eyes.

A petite girl in a white dress stomped past them. "Move!" she demanded.

Zuko hopped out of her way. "Who was that?" he said.

"The princess, you dum-dum," Azula said.

"Wait, I thought that the princess was just an urban legend," he objected.

"She's not," Azula said. "Her father just feels the need to be overprotective. If you ask me, I think parents really ought let their children have more freedom."

"You're just saying that because Dad won't let us come home until we've found the avatar."

"Shut up."

"You know I'm right."

"I said shut up, you little scarab beetle."

"I'm telling Mom."

"Mom's dead."

"No, she's not. I think she just left. It was really unclear."

"Oh, stop it!" Azula huffed. She paused outside of the throne room. "Let's get our stories straight. We need the key to the royal library."

"Right," Zuko said. "So we can research the ancient Earth Kingdom tradition of giving water buffaloes to the people."

"Correct."

"Of all the random traditions to use as a cover story, you choose _water buffaloes_?"

"You think of something better, then."

"How about-"

"I wasn't serious!" she exclaimed. "Good grief, I can't believe you're first in line for the throne. Now be quiet, and follow my lead."

Azula pushed the door to the throne room open. "I don't know where she gets it from," the king was saying to the queen as he slumped in his throne. "You weren't nearly so picky."

Azula cleared her throat. "Your majesty?"

"Oh, yes," King Lao said. "Princess Azula, Prince Zuko. Such a pleasure to see you."

Azula curtsied deeply. "You seem distraught, sire," she said.

"It's my daughter," he said.

"You have a daughter?" Azula repeated, playing dumb.

Zuko frowned. "But Az, you just said- ow!" She elbowed him sharply in the ribs. "_Ow_."

"It's this suitor business," the queen said, seemingly unaware of the argument that had just taken place. "The princess simply refuses to accept any of the princes we offer to her."

"This one's available," Azula said, pointing her thumb over her shoulder at her brother. "Only slightly damaged."

"Azula!" Zuko said, horrified, as he covered his scar.

The king sighed and sat up straight. "I don't mean to bore you with personal problems," he said. "Is there something I can do for you two?"

"We'd just like to borrow the key to the royal library," Azula said.

"Hm? Oh, yes, go ahead," King Lao said. He nodded to his wife, who unfastened a small gold key from the chatelaine at her belt.

Azula curtsied again. "Thank you both," she said. She took the key eagerly, grabbed Zuko by the wrist, and marched out of the throne room.

"That went well," he commented. "We didn't even have to say anything about the water buffaloes." He paused. "Why are we researching water buffaloes anyway?"

"We're not, you idiot," she said, rolling her eyes. "_Honestly._"

"Well, you keep giving me all these cover stories, and I don't know what we're actually doing," he protested.

"We need to find out who the diamond in the rough might be," Azula said. "Obviously that earthbending twit with the silly mustache was not the correct diamond."

"More like a hunk of quartz," Zuko snickered.

"You need to stop hanging out with Uncle Iroh. You're picking up his sense of humor." Azula tossed her hair out of her eyes. "Once we've found the right man, we can break into the cave of the avatar. And once we have the avatar, we can go home. And once we go home-"

"Everything will be right again," Zuko sighed.

-----

Katara bolted upright, blinking awake in the darkness. "Princess?" she said.

The bedchamber remained quiet.

"Toph?" she called.

Still nothing.

Katara rolled her eyes and picked up her robe. "I wouldn't have taken this job if I knew it meant babysitting a blind sleepwalker," she mumbled. "If she walked into the rosebushes again, someone else is going to have to pull the thorns out. Not me again."

She slid her arms through the gauzy sleeves and tied the sash tightly as she padded through the spacious room. Sure enough, the princess's canopied bed was vacant. Katara huffed and stomped towards the verandah.

A very small figure crept towards the broad wall surrounding the garden. As Katara approached, the intruder whirled around, hands up. "Not the hair!" she pleaded.

Katara grabbed Toph by one of her long braids. "Princess," she growled. "What in the name of the big blue ocean are you doing?"

"I'm sorry, Katara, but I can't stay here and have my life lived for me," the young princess said. She glared in the wrong direction.

Katara sighed. "You know I can't, as the lady-in-waiting that your parents appointed, support in you good conscience," she said.

Toph scowled. "I figured as much," she groused.

"But besides that, you go, girl," Katara said. She let go of Toph's hair. "Shall I give you a boost?"

"You shall," Toph said. Katara lifted the younger girl closer to the top of the wall; with a nimble swing, the princess leapt over the top. She held onto the edge for a moment. "Well, bye!"

Katara waved back before she could remember that Toph couldn't see.

-----

"Try this!" the salesman hollered. "Try this! Your taste buds will dance and sing!"

Sokka took a bite of the melon that Momo had stolen while the big man's back was turned. "I don't know about you, Momo, but my taste buds aren't dancing," he commented. Momo chattered in agreement. "Oh, well. Breakfast is served!"

Sokka took another huge bite. The pink-hued melon tasted sweet and spicy, but it still wasn't quite enough to fill his rumbling stomach. He chomped down, scraping his teeth against the bitter rind.

Momo yelped and plucked at his sleeve. "What?" he mumbled around the mouthful. "I split it evenly. You got the same amount as me."

The lemur pointed into the marketplace. Sokka followed his gaze. A petite, pretty girl had bumped into a firebender who was showing off tricks; the bender's eyes bulged and he coughed. The girl laughed as her hood fell back.

"Wow," Sokka said under his breath. She was pale but rosy-cheeked, with delicate features undermined by a mouth slightly too wide for conventional beauty. Long, glossy black braids hung behind her small ears. She wore a cloak of dark green linen, and despite the heat of the late morning, she drew the hood over her head.

Momo chattered. "What? No, I didn't just say 'wow'," Sokka denied irritably. He turned his attention back to the slightly overripe melon.

"No one steals from my cart!"

Sokka nearly choked on his melon. The salesman below him looked like he was about to blow. The pretty girl stood in front of him, her arms folded behind her back in complete unconcern. "Oh, I'm sorry, sir," she said. "I don't have any money."

"Thief!" the merchant bellowed.

"If you let me go to the palace, I can get some from the king," she offered.

The salesman grabbed her small wrists and pulled her down over the counter of his cart. Her hood drooped back and her long braids flew in the air. Sokka wiped melon juice from his chin and watched, mouth agape. "Do you know what the penalty is for stealing?" he threatened. He pulled out a long silver knife.

"No!" the girl cried. "No, please!"

Sokka leaped from the roof to the awning to the ground and caught the man by the throat. "Thank you, kind sir. I'm so glad you found her," he said easily. The salesman stared at him in confusion. Sokka turned to the girl. She didn't look at him. "I've been looking all over for you."

"What are you doing?" she whispered.

"Just play along," he whispered back.

"You know this girl?" the salesman rumbled.

"Sadly, yes," Sokka said. He took the girl's captured hands while the salesman was startled, turning her in a circle and extricating her from his grasp simultaneously. "She's my sister. And she's a little crazy."

"She said she knows the king," the salesman said.

"She thinks the lemur's the king," Sokka said, pointing at Momo. Momo stood up on top of a barrel and preened.

To Sokka's surprise, the girl swept an elaborate curtsy and fell on her knees in front of the lemur. "Oh wise king," she said. "How may I serve you?"

"Tragic, isn't it?" Sokka said. He picked the girl up around her waist and tossed her over his shoulder with her knees against his chest. "Now come along, sis. Time to see the doctor."

"Oh, hello, Doctor, how are you?" she said in a dreamy sort of voice.

He twisted to see over his shoulder and found her staring at an ostrich horse. "No, no, no," he said, stifling a laugh. "Not that one." He clicked his tongue for Momo. "Come along, your majesty."

He carried the girl through the souk. Momo followed them close behind. Conversation was rendered impossible, between the noise of the marketplace and that fact that he was facing her little bare feet instead of her face. Sokka carried her towards one of the many back alleys and set her on her feet in front of a wooden ladder. "Follow me," he said, and he climbed up eagerly.

She followed him slowly, as if she couldn't see where she was going. "I want to thank you for stopping that man," she said. She tripped over the top rung of the ladder and he caught her. The hood of her cloak shifted onto her shoulders and he found himself looking straight into her eyes. They were large and luminous and a lovely shade of green…and clearly sightless.

He realized he was staring. "Uh, forget it," he stammered.

Sunshine bore down on them as they stood on the roof, facing each other awkwardly. "So, uh," he said, clearing his throat. He snatched up a long pole."This is your first time in the marketplace, huh?"

He vaulted over the space between buildings, Momo clinging to his shoulder. Across the way he saw her smile and wrinkle her nose. It was cute. "Is it that obvious?" she said.

"Well, you do kind of stand out," he said. She tossed her long, glossy braids over her narrow shoulders. His cheeks flushed. "I mean, um, you don't seem to know how dangerous the city can be."

Sokka picked up a wide plank and set it down carefully between the two buildings. He bent down to adjust it, and something flew over his head. He straightened quickly. The pretty girl leaned casually on a pole. "I'm a fast learner," she said, her silvery green eyes shaded by her thick black lashes.

"Right," he stammered. "Come on this way."

He walked through the interlocking maze of abandoned buildings and vacant stairwells, picking his way through from memory. She reached over and wrapped her fingers around his wrist; her skin was soft and smooth. He swallowed hard. "Watch your head."

She ducked. "Is this where you live?" she asked.

"Yep," he said. "Just me and Momo. We come and go as we please."

"Fabulous," she sighed. He glanced over his shoulder, but she didn't seem sarcastic. In fact, she looked jealous.

"Well, it's not much, but it's got a great view," he said. He pulled back the tattered curtain to reveal the gleaming white palace, then glanced down at her. "Just take my word for it. You can see the palace perfectly from here."

"Wonderful," she said, but this time it sounded a bit sarcastic.

He leaned his elbows on the window ledge, feeling the warmth of the sun on his face. "I wonder what it would be like to live there," he mused. "To have servants and valets…"

"Oh, sure," she said. He glanced at her. She sat on the floor with her green linen dress hiked up almost her knees and dug her bare feet into the dirt. "People to tell you where to go and how to dress."

"It's better than here," Sokka shrugged. "Always scraping for food and ducking the guards."

"You're not free to make your own choices," she said.

"Sometimes you feel so-"

"You're just-"

"Trapped," they said in unison.

She looked at the ground and he looked at her. Sokka opened his mouth to say something, but instead he picked up the apple that Momo was about to bite. "So where are you from?" he asked, nonchalantly tossing the apple in her direction. It bounced off her forehead. "Sorry."

"What does it matter?" she sighed. She rubbed her forehead and took a large bite of the red-skinned apple. "I ran away, and I'm not going back."

"Really?" Sokka said. "Why does a girl like you run away?"

She pushed the partially chewed apple to one side of her mouth. "My parents are forcing me to get married," she said, her cheek bulging.

"That's awful," he said. "A girl as pretty as you should-"

She nearly choked. "What?"

Sokka felt his ears burn. He looked around for an excuse and grabbed Momo. "Momo says…that's not fair," he fibbed.

She swallowed the rest of the bite of apple and wiped a drop of juice from her chin. "Oh, did he?" she teased.

"Yeah, of course," he said.

She sidled up to him until she was leaning against the window ledge too, her hip touching his. "And does Momo have anything else to say?" she said.

"Well," he said slowly, willing his heartbeat to be calm again. "Uh…he wishes there was something he could do to help."

"Hm," she said. "Tell him that's very…sweet."

She was so close that he could breathe in the scent of soap and lotus blossoms. His arm touched hers. She closed her eyes. He leaned in until his lips were nearly touching hers; he could taste the sweet stickiness of apple juice.

Several guards clattered into the abandoned attic, their swords clanking at their sides. He choked and she tumbled over his knee. "There you are!" the captain growled.

"They've found me!" they yelped. They turned to each other and frowned. "They're after you?"

Sokka glanced out the wide-open window as she backed against the wall. "My father must have sent them," she groaned.

"Do you trust me?" he said.

She blinked. "What?" she said.

He took her by the hand. "Do you trust me?" he repeated.

"Yes," she said slowly, her slender fingers wrapping around his.

"Then jump!" he hollered. He leaped out the window. She screamed shrilly, locking her arms around his waist. They plummeted into a heap of burlap sacks in the now-quiet marketplace below. "You all right?"

"Ask me when my equilibrium's back," she panted, struggling to her feet. He helped her up and took off running.

"We just keep running into each other, don't we, street rat?" the guard grinned as he pressed his dagger against Sokka's throat.

The other guards poured into the alley. One of them held Momo by the tail. "It's the dungeon for you, boy," he grinned.

"Hey, get off of me," Sokka argued, wrestling away.

"Let go of him," the girl ordered. She sounded rather bossy.

"Look what we have here, boys," the captain leered. He took the girl by one long braid and tossed her back as easily as a child would toss a doll. "A street mouse."

Rather than bursting in tears, the girl leaped to her feet, scowling fiercely. "Unhand him," she commanded. "By order of the princess."

She ripped off the green linen cloak. Underneath she wore a simple knee-length dress of spring green silk, with a gold and jade pendant around her neck. Sokka swallowed hard as he recognized the flying boar- the symbol of the royal house. "The princess?" he spluttered.

She sighed. "Sorry," she said. "I don't like it any better than you do."

"But I thought you were just a myth!"

"Do I look like a myth to you?"

The guards bowed deeply. "What are you doing outside the palace? And with this street rat?" the captain said. "And without shoes?"

"That's not your concern," the young princess said, crossing her arms. "Do as I command and release him."

"Well, I would, princess, but my orders from the king," the captain said, perplexed. "He said that Prince Zuko and Princess Azula of the Fire Nation ordered for his arrest."

"I don't even know them!" Sokka protested. "I was framed!"

"You'll have to take it up with them," the captain of the guard said, almost apologetically.

The princess glared, although it was in the wrong direction. "Believe me," she said. "I will."

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**Author's Notes:**

This is seriously a joy to write. I haven't written a comedy, much less a parody, in _forever_. I really ought to do this more often.

I think my favorite part is writing the arguments between Zuko and Azula. They're hilarious when they play for the same team.

I also have a reference from one the best "Silly Songs with Larry" from Veggie Tales. There's a whole song about "everybody's got a water buffalo/yours is fast but mine is slow/oh, where we get them I don't know/but everybody's got a water buffalo." Love it. This might come into play later.

Also: Katara as Rajah FOR THE WIN.

And Sokka and Toph are just too precious.

I hope you're enjoying this!


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Avatar: The Last Airbender belongs to Bryke and Nickelodeon, not me. Neither does Aladdin- he belongs to Disney.

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"All right, so you've got it covered?" Azula said.

"You mean I've got you-know-who you-know-where?" Zuko said.

Azula wrinkled her nose. "What?"

"I've got that street rat in the prison?"

She clapped her hand over his mouth. "Shut up! Do you want the whole palace to know what we're up to?" she hissed.

"But you just-" he protested, his voice muffled.

"Never mind," she said. "All that matters is that…ooh, hello, princess."

Zuko made a face. "Why are you calling me-" She spun him around to face the petite, barefoot, and scowling princess. "Ooh, hello, princess," he said. "Is there…uh…is there anything we can do to help you?"

"My father's guards just took a boy from the market on your orders," she snapped, tossing one of her long braids over her shoulder.

"Well…" Zuko stammered.

Azula elbowed him in the ribs and stepped around him. "Your parents were so concerned when you went missing, princess," she said sweetly. "And that boy is a criminal."

"What did he do?" Toph demanded.

"Why, he kidnapped you, of course," Azula said.

"Do you think I'd let someone kidnap me?" Toph snorted. "I ran away. He didn't do anything wrong. He was helping me!"

"Oh," said Azula.

"Oh, no," echoed Zuko.

"Oh, no, what?" Toph said.

Azula twined a lock of hair around her finger. "We didn't know, princess," she said. "Unfortunately, he has already experience the justice of the Fire Nation, fighting on your behalf."

Toph raised an eyebrow. "What kind of Fire Nation 'justice' are you talking about?" she said.

"He's dead," Zuko said.

Toph paled, then her eyes flashed. "Oh, no," she said, leaping into an earthbending stance. "All right, if that's your version of justice, here's mine!"

Zuko blocked her. "Azula, stop her!" he said.

Azula polished her fingernails as Toph tore out a chunk of the marble floor and chucked it at her brother's head. "Why me?" she said. "You could take her."

"Yeah, but she's the princess," he said. "I can't fight a girl, especially when she's our host's daughter and she's the heir to the throne!

"Who cares who I am?" Toph roared. "I'm pissed! You're going to pay!"

"Az, you fight her!" Zuko argued. "Girls can hit girls!"

Azula rolled her eyes. "Fine," she said. She zapped a little lightning at Toph; she keeled over on the floor. "I can't believe you wouldn't fight her."

"I don't like fighting girls, especially little princesses," Zuko muttered.

"You're such a softy."

"Shut up."

Azula tossed her hair over her shoulder. "Never mind," she said. "We have other things to think about."

-----

Sokka sighed. The chains that held his wrists to the wall rattled. "I can't believe she was actually the princess," he said, his voice echoing in the barren chamber. "She must think I'm a total idiot."

Something scurried past him. "Ack! No more rabbit rats!" he shrieked. "I'm tired of you guys jumping on me!"

Momo jumped down to his shoulder, chattering loudly. "Oh, it's just you," he sighed. "Get me out of here, will you?"

The lemur poked at the cuffs on his wrists and chittered. "Come on, Momo, it's not like that," Sokka said. "She was in trouble." He leaned against the wall and smiled. "It was worth it."

Momo thumped him on the ear. "Ow," Sokka complained. "Don't get so worried about it. We're never going to see her again, anyways. She's a princess that most people believe doesn't even exist, and I'm just a street rat."

The cuffs unlatched and Sokka stood up, rubbing his wrists. "I'm a stupid fool of a street rat," he said to himself.

"You're only a fool if you give up."

Sokka leaped backwards; Momo jumped on his head. "Where did you come from?" he sputtered.

"I've, uh, been here the whole time." A hunched-over man draped in a ragged cloak shuffled out of the dark corner.

"Sure you have," Sokka said warily. "Who are you?"

"Just a prisoner, like you," the man said in a low, croaky voice. "But if we work together…maybe we can be more?"

"More what?" Sokka said.

"We can get out of here," the old man snapped.

"I'm listening."

"About ten miles outside the city there's a cave," the old man said, raising his arms mystically. "It's a cave of wonders, where the Avatar once lived."

"The Cave of the Avatar is just an urban legend," Sokka said skeptically. He scratched the back of his neck. "Then again, so was the princess."

"The Cave of the Avatar is filled with treasures," the old man said. "Enough treasure to impress a princess, if you like."

Sokka tapped his chin. "I do like stuff, especially when it sparkles," he mused. "But why are you telling me all this?"

"I'm old, you fool," the man said. "I need somebody younger and stronger to get in there and get what I need."

"And what is it you need?" Sokka asked.

"Nothing, really," the man shrugged. "Just a whistle."

Sokka raised an eyebrow. "A cave full of treasure, and all you want is a whistle?" he said. He shrugged. "Well, who am I to judge?"

"Excellent," said the old man. "We leave immediately!"

"Just one problem," Sokka said. "We're kind of, I don't know, in a dungeon. How are we going to get out?"

The man reached into the pockets and pulled out a glinting key. "I think this should do the trick," he grinned.

"Ooh," Sokka said. "Nice."

-----

Katara opened the wide double doors to the verandah. The walled garden was quiet and peaceful. "It's _too _quiet and peaceful," she mumbled.

Moonlight shone off the shallow reflecting pool, casting silvery shadows over the water lilies and lotuses. She peered into the darkness. "Princess?" she called. "Are you out here?"

She caught sight of movement under the magnolia tree. Katara walked towards it. The princess was huddled against the wide trunk, her arms wrapped around her knees. "You missed dinner," she said. "Do you want me to make you something?"

"No," Toph said quietly.

"You're not hungry?" Katara teased. "It must be a sign of the apocalypse!" She paused. "Are you crying?

"No," she mumbled, swiping at her eyes.

"Yes, you are," Katara said, sitting down next to her. "What's wrong?"

Toph rested her chin on her knees. Her bright eyes were red-rimmed. "You know the boy I told you about?" she said, her voice thick.

"The one who helped you in the marketplace?"

"He's dead," Toph whispered. "Those stupid Fire Nation nobles thought they kidnapped me and they had him killed."

"Oh, Toph," Katara said, wrapping her arm around the younger girl. "I'm sorry."

"I didn't even know his name," Toph whispered. "And now he's dead, and it's all my fault."

-----

Sokka surveyed the wide opening of the cave warily. "And all I have to do is bring back the whistle, right?" he said.

"Yes, yes," the old man said. "Don't touch anything but the whistle. Once you've brought to me, you can have anything you want."

"Anything I want?" Sokka said. He cracked his knuckles. "I can handle that. Come on, Momo."

He approached the mouth of the cave. "Who approaches?" a deep voice rumbled.

Sokka leaped back. "It talks?" he shrieked.

"Sh!" the old man hissed.

Sokka edged forward. "Just, um, Sokka, oh, great talking cave," he said.

"Proceed," the voice echoed.

Sokka patted Momo's head and inched down the wide sand steps. The voice said nothing else, and he made his way down the long, spiraling passage to the bottom. He reached the end of the stairwell and blinked in the half-light at the gold, silver, and jewels that heaped around him. "Look at that," he breathed. "Just a handful of this would make me richer than the king."

Momo ran lightly down his arm to the ground and reached for a polished moonstone orb. "No!" Sokka scolded, grabbing him by his long furry tail. "Don't touch anything. We just have to find that whistle shaped like a bison."

He walked further and further into the cave. "Gold coins," he mumbled. "Rubies. Sapphires. Jewelry. Candelabras." He paused. "Why are candelabras always in treasure troves?" Momo shrugged. "How on earth are we supposed to find a measly old whistle in the middle of all this?"

Momo ran ahead and pointed. Sokka squinted. A tall pillar stood in the center of a deep blue lake, illuminated by a shaft of white light. "Well, maybe that's it," he said.

He climbed the tall steps that led to the pillar and approached it cautiously. Sure enough, a little cracked clay whistle in the shape of a sky bison rested on the top. Sokka picked it up and studied it. "That's it?" he said, incredulous. "We came all the way for a stupid toy. Momo, look at-"

He turned just in time to see Momo grab a ruby the size of his head. "Momo, don't!" he shouted.

"Infidels!" the deep cave voice rumbled.

"Uh-oh," Sokka said in a small voice.

"You have touched the forbidden treasure!" Momo dropped the massive ruby back where it belonged and patted it lightly. "Now you will never again see the light of day."

"But I like the light of day!" Sokka shrieked.

The calm lake beneath him rumbled and evaporated into a pool of white-hot fire. Sokka shoved the whistle in his pocket and scrambled down the stone steps as they melted beneath him.

"The floor is lava, the floor is lava!" he shouted. He grabbed Momo and ran for it.

The lava poured over the treasure, tumbling languidly towards him. He ran faster than he had ever run in his life. The sand steps crumbled under his feet, but he reached the mouth of the cave and burst into the cool night air, gasping for breath.

"Did you get the whistle?" the old man demanded.

Sokka leaned over, his hands on his knees, and gasped for breath. "That's the least of my worries right now, but yeah, I got it," he panted.

"Give it to me," the man said.

Sokka fumbled in his pocket and pulled it out. "I can't believe I risked my life for that," he said. "You know, I never would have agreed to this if I thought that this would happen." He straightened up. "Um, what are you doing?"

"Sending you to your eternal reward," the man said, and he pushed Sokka into the cave. Sokka tumbled backwards, smashing the remains of the sand steps. He fell hard to the hot floor, and everything went black.

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**Author's Notes:**

OMG, I got the funniest review on this story. An anonymous reviewer was all like, "Um, this is waaay too much like Aladdin. You should just give up and try writing something original."

Well, _duh. _It's called a _parody_.

It gave me a giggle fit.

In other news, I had fun rewriting Toph's reaction vs. Jasmine's reaction. It always bothered me that when Jafar told her that Aladdin was dead, she just hollered "Ooooohhhhh nooooeees!" and burst into tears and ran away. Toph's definitely more dynamic.

I hope you liked this!


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